Sunday, October 03, 2004
i was like a fool!!! help mi!!!
yday went for band prac... from 10 in the morning till ard 2.. coz i left early to meet nel and gang to do project at my place.. they came to my house didn't really do project juz come here explore explore..

after project i went to enter to look for him.. i was like a fool like a fucking stupid idiot!!! i hate myself!!! i felt so terrible... i felt so awkward... i felt like an idiot... but worst i stayed there thruout making myself even more like an idiot... i dunnno wat to do... seeing him and her together... i dun even belong there... i was like an outcast juz like a fool... wat else can i think of... i dunnno.... i dunno how long can i take it??? why has god always been so cruel... making me madly in love with him??? sometimes i tot of leaving his world completely but how to??? i dunno... i dun have the courage to be with him... i dun have the courage to leave him either... why am i such a useless bimbo??? juz tok to jh online... i can also tell jh how i felt but juz can't tell him... i dunnno why!!! i'm fucking upset... i am really lost... jh told mi py felt equally uneasy as well yday... i understand... i've nv dislike her coz in fact i find her to be a very nice gal as well... but i juz dunno how to face her... worse to face her and him together... sometimes juz cried myself to slp... coz i dunno wat to do... who to tell... who to confide in... no one!!! nobody can understand how i feel... can anybody pls help mi!!!!! i'm losing appetite losing sleeps... dunno is it cz of all this... but i'm juz fucking sick of my life!!!

he juz called mi... actually i send him like about 8 sms in a go... tell him how i felt and stuffs... took the whole morning to type the sms... and god again playing a prank on mi... he called and tell mi he said he didn't receive my msg... and worst it was not saved in the unsent items in my hp coz my msgs were full... haiz... mayb really not meant to be together... trying so hard finally manage to send him msg and it was not sent!!! wat the fuck is going on???


Love, Shandy.
1:15 PM


+*"~ About me ~"*+
Name: Shandy Yap Shiwei
Emailadd: shandy_flute@yahoo.com OR
shandy_wei@hotmail.com

Location: Singapore
First Cry: 12 September 1985
Horoscope: Virgo
Lurfee:
* My Emperor Sim
* My family
* My besties liting, aihui+jeff choo, yanting+sumo, jasmine+jeremy, and the guys
* good friend tanny
* cardiac angels yizhen, junel, weiling, debbie, meiria, meihui, xinying, weiping.
* sweetheart batchgirls venie, donna, lindy, jenn
Wishlist:
* Wonderful colleagues onboard
* To be happy~ =)
Places i've been to:
* Africa- johannesburg
* Australia- Adelaide
* Australia - Brisbane
* Australia - Melbourne
* Australia - perth
* Australia - Sydney
* Canada- Vancouver
* China - beijing
* China - hong kong
* China - Shanghai
* France - Paris
* greece - athens
* Holland - Amsterdam
* India - bombay
* Indonesia - batam
* Indonesia - bintan
* Indonesia - jakarta
* Italy - Rome
* Italy - milan
* Japan - Nagoya
* Japan - Osaka
* Japan - Tokyo
* Korea - Seoul
* Malaysia- Cameron Highlands
* Malaysia - genting highlands
* Malaysia - kuala lumpur
* Malaysia - terengganu
* Maldives - male
* New Zealand - auckland
* New Zealand - Christchurch
* Pulau ubin
* Philippines - manila
* Russia - Moscow
* switzerland - zurich
* taiwan - taipei
* turkey - istanbul
* United kingdom - london
* United kingdom - manchester
* United States - los angeles
* United States - Texas - Houston
* United States - Sans Francisco
* UAE - abu dhabi
* UAE - Dubai
darr-links
*My dear ones*
cassis collections
Darling AIHUI aka Avril
Darling Yanting aka Kate
Jie
*Shuqun*
Belinda
Yaying
Evelyn
*S'pore Poly*
Weiling
XiaoB
*SIA*
Sherry lee
Lindy Tan
Venecia
Jennifer
*Others*
Gerald
my links
Shandy's friendster
Shandy's facebook
Perfect blogshop for bags - Cassis room

Olivia - Sometimes When We Touch - Olivia
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